I never thought THIS is how much PAIN cowardice gives a person. I just feel so low right now for not taking enough courage to say and do what I should have said and done long ago. Quite honestly, writing down this entry is almost useless. It is because time has changed everything now. It's different now. It's harder because I've come down from the peak of the matter. The matter is, by the way, LOVE [yuck]. I just realize that when you're at the peak of something, you should never have qualms of doing what you're suppose to because you'll not gonna stay there forever. Once you lose the chance, the chance is you lose what it first offered. Worse than this, when you begin to realize that someone else is getting the same chances you've lost, the chance is you might not stand the fact that you can not find a way to get back what you've lost. This is probably how I failed as a person capable of loving [yuck]. The truth of the matter is that humans are suppose to make use and carry with them all that they can because they'll never pick them up afterwards. Now, when I look back, I can't help regretting. I can't help realizing how coward I have been. I can't help feeling really low and stupid for letting go of what I should have kept and made use. Perhaps another truth in life is that humans don't know what they have unless they've lost it. AYING, yves ray
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